I was out for a *few* drinks with a good friend.  I remember going to the toilets to see what was going on with my jaw. It felt kind of loose, like perhaps it had clicked out of place. My speech was a little slurred, I remember my friend nearly falling off her chair as I tried to string a sentence together.  We both thought it was absolutely hilarious and definitely alcohol induced.

The next morning, I had a particularly important meeting with the head of a government division. By this point half of my face was totally paralysed, including half of my tongue. My eye was streaming constantly, I couldn’t blink. Coincidentally, the person I was meeting had had an allergic reaction that morning, his whole face was swollen, and so the two of us trying to communicate was highly comical. But by this point my boss had had enough, he called a halt to the meeting and sent us both on our ways to get some help.

This is when the fear kicked in and it stopped being funny. Especially when the doctor tested me for a stroke.  Thankfully it was something else, called Bell’s Palsy.  This is temporary facial paralysis that lasts about 6 weeks.  Not much is known about it, or why it happens. Some say its viral, others say stress, and potentially it’s a combination of the two.  It is certainly more likely to take hold when you are run-down.

In the 6 months before this I had changed roles within the business, taken a step up and needed to build a team. I agreed to work on both roles, my current and new role, for a hand-over period (essentially doing two jobs at once), I was also looking for two execs to help in my new team and doing their work whilst trying to recruit.  I wanted to do a good job, not let anyone down, and deliver fantastic events. 

Frequently I would be in the office until gone 11pm, just me and the mice (these were the days before laptops).  I would eat little and sporadically. And when I did eventually leave I’d often try to catch up to where my colleagues were in the pub. It never occurred to be me as a 28yr old – I could break. 

But break I did, and 7 years later it happened again, also in very stressful circumstances.  Uncommonly my face did not repair itself properly and I will need treatment for the rest of my life. 

The lesson I learned: we do have limits, our bodies are breakable, we should not be damaging our health for a job.  Nobody, absolutely nobody, will thank you for getting yourself into this state.  And that is my reason for starting this blog. 

This month I have a few tips on managing your working hours through the peaks and troughs:

WORKING HOURS

1.      Firstly, plan for those peaks and troughs! 

Finish on time when you’re out of peak season and use this time to do all the thing a normal human being does; relax and have fun.

2.      Breathe 

Bizarrely one of the most valuable lessons I have learnt is to breathe.  Without realising, we hold our breath when we are stressed and this can cause untold health problems.  Whether you’re into yoga or not it is well worth investing time in learning some breathing exercises. Not only will it calm you, but it will supply more oxygen to your brain to help you solve those problems quicker.

3.      Prioritise

Every morning (or previous evening if you prefer) divide up your to-do list into:

1. Important/Urgent

2. Important/Not Urgent 

3. Not Important/Urgent 

4. Not Important/Not Urgent

We overwhelm ourselves by keeping things on our list we really shouldn’t have on there in the first place. Cross off everything in that fourth box and fix it in ‘peace time’.

4.      Exercise

Stress will mangle up your body, stopping the energy flow.  Make time to exercise, whatever you like to do, is important.  It will help you with your job by giving you more energy.

5.      Eat well

In ‘battle time’ we can get into some really bad eating habits, not leaving our desk throughout the day, just grazing rubbish or not eating anything at all. Or worse still, going out for a drink and not eating. Recognise your bad habits and nip them in the bud. You are what you eat…. and your body needs fuel to keep running.

6.      Know your limits

Listen to your body.  If you have frequent headaches or a persistent cold you can’t shift, you are pushing yourself too hard. And like I said, you can actually break.

7.      Don’t forget your friends and family

It is just a job, there are more important things.  I bet many of you, like me, have ignored friends for months, or told family you need to work weekends, whilst in the thick of it.  Then wondered where they are when you’re out the other side… Again, it’s just a job and you only have one life.

8.      What is your work pattern, when do you perform at your best?

Understand your body clock.  I’m a late owl, I do my best work in the morning and late at night.  I am rubbish in the afternoon.  Knowing that about myself helps me to plan my day.  I put the important tasks at the beginning of the day, the big tasks in the evening and the niggly things in the afternoon, like answering emails.

9.      As a manager you can’t expect your team to do the same hours

Don’t rain down the pain. Understand not everyone will have the same work ethic as you and they have their right to do 9-5.30.  It’s right to expect a team mentality in ‘battle time’ but don’t teach them your bad habits. 

10.  When is enough, enough?

Usually when you start to get tearful and can no longer put on a brave face for the team. When you start to snap at people for little things you should brush over. I’m not a crier, so my stress comes out in other fun ways like facial paralysis.  But if you are feeling overwhelmed and depressed, if it is affecting your physical and mental health.  That is enough.

11.  Boundaries are important

You need to set boundaries with your line managers and peers.  If things continually seem to be getting done by the little marketing pixies then they will turn a blind eye and expect it to keep happening.  And they, unless they’re also in the office until 11pm, aren’t necessarily going to know that’s what you’re doing.  If regularly you haven’t finished your work by 6pm, and you know you’re working on full steam, then you are overloaded.  Don’t’ do the work that slips off the list at the end of the day and explain to the team why it hasn’t happened. (Note: Please use tip number 3 before doing this!)

12.  Ask for help

Sometimes we can be our own worst enemies.  You must always ask for help if you need it.  There is no shame in that.  As a director I would much rather my team tell me that they couldn’t cope at the time, rather than wait until something important has slipped. It’s much harder to win favour once things start collapsing.

13.  Get it off your plate

Firstly, make sure you have delegated all you can to your team.  Check if there is any capacity in another team in ‘peace time’. Think about getting in an (experienced) extra pair of hands. And you should also think about what time-consuming projects you could outsource. 

I hope that helps a little. For more information and support on dealing with stress you can contact www.stressmatters.org.uk or https://healthy-working.com/ and there are many other support channels. Reach out.

Next time I will be talking about contingency planning.

Keep well and look after your precious selves.

 

- Kate 💖